The United States may be a country divided into blue and red, with some of us carving ‘B’s on our faces and some of us laughing at prank calls like 5th graders, but this Tuesday night everyone will be united by that epic American invention, the TV: crammed around a screen big or small, watching the live election results come in and praying to Uncle Sam that our candidate with nary a mention of hanging chads or a recount.
Instead of enduring hours of agonizing waiting with nothing to do but scream at the pundits, grab your friends, appoint a responsible designated driver and make this an election night to remember- or forget. It’s your choice. Just like the vote.
First things first: get some alcohol. You can do this with regular old beer (domestic, of course) or get fancy with blue and red jello shots or Blue Hawaiians and Red Bull and Vodka. Or go for “Depression 2.0″ style with the cheap date: PBR blinged out with red and blue food coloring.
TAKE A DRINK EVERY TIME YOU HEAR:
| Maverick
Muslim Celebrity ACORN Al Gore Landslide Hockey Mom Battleground State Terrorists Saturday Night Live Prank Call Joe the Plumber 2000 Election |
Disenfranchised
The Math Battleground State Patriotism Family Values Too Close to Call France Recount Surge Youtube Socialist Youth Vote Irregularities Bill Clinton |
DO A SHOT or FINISH YOUR DRINK EVERY TIME:
A state gets called for a candidate and then it is retracted
Someone says something nice about George W. Bush
Osama bin Laden is found
An average American is mentioned by name
Anyone mentions Reagan
A state is called for the opposite side as it was in 2004
Someone in the room screams “OBAMA!” or “MCCAIN!”
Palin and 2012 are mentioned in the same sentence
A candidate gains over 300 electoral votes
Someone refers to Sarah Palin as a MILF
MAKE YOUR FRIEND DRINK EVERY TIME YOU CAN:
Convince a third party to do a Palin impression.
Find someone who can name the capital cities of Pennsylvania, Florida, and Ohio
Get someone to change the channel OFF of election results- with another drink every minute until it is turned back.
POUR YOUR DRINK ON YOUR HEAD AND GO HOME CRYING IF:
McCain is declared President of the United States.
RUN WITH JOYFUL SHOUTING INTO THE STREETS IF:
Obama is declared President of the United States.
***WARNING: The whole purpose of drinking games is to get drunk. CultureMob is NOT responsible for any stupid, dangerous, or asinine behavior by anyone at anytime***
Click on the city name to find election parties in Seattle, Portland, San Francisco, Austin, Denver, Boston, & Chicago, and Washington D.C.
No related posts.
{ 6 comments }
I’m not a big fan of drinking games–I don’t need anybody to TELL me to finish my drink, thankyouvermuch.
Instead, I’ll be playing Election Night Bingo–you can download the cards here: http://urbzen.com/2008/11/03/election-bingo/
Hey Stephanie,
You and your grandparents can head out to bingo, I’m heading to the bar with hundreds of my closest friends to partake in one of the biggest celebrations this country will see in my lifetime. And yes, there will be shots involved.
Are you nutz?
Have you ever played a well rounded drinking game before?
You would be trashed within 20 minutes of starting this game if you were watching any major network coverage of the election.
I play drinking games at least twice a week because I am a professional drunk — yet seemingly not an alcoholic — and I can tell you right now that this is the worst way to set up a drinking game such as you have suggested.
First, select one (or two, if you must) “sound bites” to drink to every time they are uttered. Keep them simple, such as your favorite candidates name or the name of your local congressman (they are all up for re-election this year so it ought’ to be easy for anyone to find their local candidate).
Next, take a shot every time a state is projected, or “called” to have won for either presidential candidate.
If you need to drink more than this, your probably married to your sister, or your not a professional drunk, just an alcoholic.
Wow, what a great night for the American People…Half Black, Half White, and all HOPE…
stephanie –> useless comment, just like this one.
great post!
professional drunk? u sound like a professional asshole!
Comments on this entry are closed.